Monday, August 20, 2012

Date Change and Support System

My surgery date has been changed to September 24. A week later than I had anticipated but that's ok. I'm getting it done and that's the important thing. Today I saw my primary doc to be cleared for surgery. Last thing I need to do now is get my upper endoscopy on Thursday. I've had a colonoscopy or two in my day so I'm not foreign to the whole scoping world, BUT I've never been scoped up top and in fact have had a panic attack in the dentists chair before during a procedure that I needed to have stopped so I could bring myself back down to earth. Anxiety is something I sometimes struggle with. Funny thing is most people that know me don't view me as the anxious type. I'm the gal who is stable and keeps it all together. I am the level headed one that other people go to for advice and can be depended on to keep my cool in times of distress. Hell, I volunteered downtown Manhattan during the 9/11 attacks. If anyone keeps it together it's me...  Except when it comes to my own health. Thank goodness I have some excellent support around me. When I had my band surgery, my brother, his wife and my niece all took care of me after surgery. They were kind enough to take me back to their house and help take after me. All three of them probably have no idea how much this means to me and that it made me feel so much closer to them. I appreciate them so very much. This go around I have a man at home to look after me. Something I did not have before.  My boyfriend has been invaluable. He has talked me down from some emotional ledges. When I have felt defeated and was self loathing he reminded me of my worth and has helped me to see how loved I am. I appreciate him and value him more than he could possible comprehend.  If anyone asked me what was really important to know before going into this process, it would be that you need to have support around you. A support system can do wonders for you. They cheer for you when you're up, pick you up when you're down, laugh with you and even sometimes cry with you. It is important to find a way to have this support whether through a support group, online community or family or friends. Support can be instrumental in helping this process be a successful one. I highly recommend it. 

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